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kowaiyoukaiTitle: We Reach Our Apogee Slowly (Part 6c)
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kowaiyoukai
Rating: R
Pairing: eventual like whoa Kirk/Spock (STFU), Spock/Uhura (blame JJ, not me)
Warning(s): Angst, meta, language, attempts at witty banter, overly-important tone, intentionally confusing parts, potentially OOC everybody
Spoilers: Star Trek XI (2009) (a.k.a. Star Trek XI, Star Trek 2009, Star Trek Reboot, New Trek, and can we please just pick one name for this fandom people?!)
Word Count: 6,624/26,171 (for this part/for all of part 6)
Disclaimer: Star Trek belongs to Gene Roddenberry, mostly, but also a lot of other people/groups like Paramount, J.J. Abrams, and the various writers/directors. I'm not one of those people, sadly, because if I was I'd be filthy rich.
Beta Acknowledgment: None! I know there are errors, so please let me know if you see any! Thanks!
Summary: Jim quickly realized he was going to have to break the rules if he wanted to survive on the Enterprise.
A/N: OMG, let's not discuss the amount of trouble I had with this part. Well, it's done now and THANK GOD FOR THAT. I'm hoping part 7 won't take nearly as long as this did, but with HBP coming out, time'll be short. I've already got plans for the midnight showing, plus at least one other showing this weekend. You guys know how that goes. *is excited*
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Othersides 1 | Part 6a | Part 6b
Spock had no idea that humans were able to get into such contorted positions while deeply unconscious. He had never slept next to anyone before, but he had seen other people sleeping, and none of them had even come close to moving the way Jim did. First of all, Jim's limbs were making a desperate attempt at escaping from his torso. His arms and legs were spread as far as they could go, bent at odd angles as if they could be free if they only kept on twisting. This might have amused Spock under normal conditions. However, Jim had started the night sleeping less than two feet away from him and had somehow managed to end it with half of his body sprawled over Spock. Even that wouldn't have been a huge problem if Jim hadn't been all sharp angles and jerky movements. One of his legs was covering Spock's right leg and had burrowed beneath his left leg, finally ending with Jim's ankle hooked around Spock's leg a few inches below his knee. Both of Jim's arms were in Spock's personal space—one was haphazardly thrown across his torso and the other was obviously meant to be pillowing Jim's head, but of course this ended in disaster with Jim's elbow resting right next to Spock's nose so that every time Spock moved his head he ended up getting poked in the eye.
Spock had no idea how he had ended up like this, since he had gone to sleep and woken up lying in the exact same position. Obviously this was all Jim's fault. Spock wanted to get up to start working on the cure, but Jim was all over him and he wasn't entirely sure how to go about removing the man without waking him up. Sure, he was strong enough to get Jim off him no problem. It was actually difficult not to move in a way that would cause Jim discomfort, given how his leg was tangled in-between Spock's own and his hand seemed content to bury itself in Spock's shirt, fingers twisting around the material.
"'S ho'," Jim mumbled, wriggling uncomfortably.
Spock inhaled and exhaled once, deeply, attempting to remain calm. They were stuck on a desert planet and Jim was pressed against Spock, who had a higher body temperature than humans did. Of course it would be hot for him. Was it really too much to ask for Jim to not make ridiculous comments while sleeping?
"Spock?" McCoy asked, quietly. "You up?"
"Yes, Doctor," Spock replied. "Have you started working on the cure?"
"No, I've been standing here watching you and Jim cuddle," McCoy said, rolling his eyes.
Spock hesitated. He tilted his head at a painful angle for a few seconds until he could make out McCoy bent over the table, working next to the emitter which was happily murmuring away. It was incredibly unlikely that McCoy had been watching them sleep. That comment must have been sarcastic. "I offered to share my blanket with him and he accepted," Spock explained. "It was the only logical course of action since—"
"Sure," McCoy interrupted. "But I don't really care right now. Are you going to help me with this or not?"
"I will assist you in a moment," Spock stated.
It took a few minutes, but Spock was eventually able to disentangle himself from Jim and stand up. He walked over to McCoy, rolling his shoulders, feeling the minor aches of sleeping on the ground get worse as he moved. "How far have you progressed?"
Almost an hour later Uhura woke up. She immediately seemed to move a bit slower than usual, but Spock brushed that off as a mixture of boredom and idleness. With nothing to do and all day to do it, anyone would take their time. She rolled up her blanket and put it away, walking around the tent a few times to amuse herself. Almost an hour after that, Jim finally sat up, stretching and yawning, kicking his feet idly out in front of him. Spock didn't even spare a glance at him, knowing Jim would only take that as permission to interrupt their work with questions designed to alleviate his boredom. Spock and McCoy had made good progress, eliminating over two hundred possible combinations of the medical supplies due to various ill effects or having no effect on the disease, but there were still plenty more to check. They didn't have time to worry about entertaining Jim and Uhura.
As the hours passed, Spock knew he was being of less and less use. He had completed all the steps that McCoy did not need to personally oversee. He didn't have the medical knowledge to run tests on the other samples himself, which left him standing there occasionally handing McCoy something or briefly checking the emitter for potential problems. However, there was nothing else to do in the tent, so unless he felt as though he was impeding McCoy's progress, Spock would stay just in case he was needed.
Or at least, that was his intention. But about two hours after they had eaten lunch, which was a spare helping of the food they had brought with them, Uhura began to behave oddly. She started walking even slower than she had been, pausing before taking each step as though she had to concentrate incredibly hard to do it. After a few minutes she sat down, slumped against her bag, and closed her eyes, breathing irregularly. Spock exchanged a glance with McCoy, then with Jim. McCoy's mouth tightened and he continued to work, concentrating on his task. Jim walked over to Uhura and knelt in front of her, saying something too quietly for Spock to hear. He paused a few moments and then got up and walked to stand next to Spock.
"She wants you," Jim said, shortly. "She's shivering, says she feels cold."
Spock glanced at Jim, but he was looking down at the table, suddenly absorbed in what McCoy was working on. "Uhura requested my presence?"
Jim shuffled his feet. "Not exactly," he hedged. "But you should go anyway. I mean, I know I… well, she wants you there."
"I see," Spock said. He turned to McCoy, who was cursing under his breath, obviously displeased with the result of his last test. "Do you require my assistance here, Doctor?"
"What?" McCoy asked, looking up briefly before going back to his work and waving a hand in Spock's general direction. "No, it's fine, just leave me be."
Spock hesitated, unsure if he would be more helpful helping Uhura or McCoy. Then Jim laid a hand on his arm and said, "Just go, okay? I'll stay here in case Bones needs anything."
Spock nodded and walked over to Uhura, sitting beside her in one swift movement. She leaned against him and he could immediately feel how low her body temperature was. Reaching behind them, Spock grasped the edge of his blanket and pulled it closer, maneuvering so that he was able to wrap her in it. Then he put his arm around her and drew her closer, knowing his own body heat combined with the natural temperature of the planet was the best combination they currently had available to maximize heat.
"You came," Uhura said. "I thought you were working with McCoy."
"I was under the impression you wanted me here," Spock replied.
"I do," she said, slowly. "Thanks. I feel all screwed up."
"Rest for now," Spock said.
Uhura was still shivering against him, but she slowly started to calm down. Spock was already thinking about what he would do if someone else got sick. If it was Jim, it wouldn't be so bad, since Spock could use his other arm and then both of them would get the warmth they needed from him. But McCoy needed to be free to work on the cure, and that would mean Spock would have to choose between them, and that was something he'd rather not consider. Technically, Spock would be able to stand next to McCoy while he worked and put an arm around his shoulders, but Spock also had doubts about just how much work McCoy would be able to get done if he started having the symptoms Uhura was currently showing. With any sort of luck, McCoy would finish the cure soon and they wouldn't even have to worry about it.
Uhura mumbled a little, half-asleep, and Spock decided to let her rest. Nothing could be gained from waking her. Jim was still by the table watching McCoy, although he darted an occasional furtive glance towards them. Spock was able to catch his eye when he was looking their way. He raised an eyebrow interrogatively, but Jim looked quickly away without replying.
Instead of worrying about the rest of them contracting the disease or Jim's confusing behavior, Spock decided to clear his mind and meditate for a while. It would do him a world of good to feel set apart from his problems for an hour or two.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jim had the worst luck in the world. There he was, trying not to get in anyone's way, and all anyone was doing was giving him hassle about it. McCoy kept on glancing at him as though he expected Jim to take the hint and go somewhere else, but there really was no place else to go. The tent was arranged so that facing McCoy was the only place where he wouldn't actually have to look at Spock and Uhura, unless he wanted to stand and stare at the wall for the rest of the day. Which, by the way, he really didn't. He'd take looking at the wall before looking at Spock holding onto Uhura, though. No questions asked.
Sure, he knew he only had himself to blame. Technically, Uhura hadn't even asked him to get Spock for her. But he had known what she wanted when she said she wasn't feeling well. They were dating, so it made sense, and Jim felt a certain sense of kinship with her. If he was in her situation, he'd want Spock to be the one holding him. He couldn't entirely blame her for it.
In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he realized he wasn't actually even all that jealous. Sure, he was a little jealous, because she had what he knew he would never be able to have, but besides that there was really nothing. He liked Uhura and she was sick. He wouldn't begrudge her some comfort now. But even more than that, Jim knew that Spock didn't want to see Uhura like this. Spock had seen enough of his friends and loved ones injured and dying. Jim didn't want him to lose anyone else.
It hit him then—really, truly punched him in the jaw—that he was in love with Spock. Not just lust, not just wanting to have completely heterosexual sex with, but love. He didn't know how it had happened. He hadn't even though it could happen, much less this quickly, but there it was. Obvious, unavoidable, and hanging over him like a blinking neon sign that he felt anyone could read at any moment. That the realization came, oddly enough, thanks to Uhura was surprising but not entirely unexpected. Watching Spock and Uhura sit quietly together in the corner had Jim uneasy. He reminded himself he wasn't all that jealous—because he wasn't, really, and the small amount he was didn't matter enough to mention it. It was that Jim suddenly realized that he truly did not want Uhura to be hurt. He hadn't ever actively wished her harm. She was an outstanding officer and he knew he was lucky to have her in his crew. Yet her relationship with Spock had left him resenting her, even when he tried not to. Now, though, Jim realized that Spock did care for Uhura. It was open to debate how much exactly and what his feelings were, but right now it didn't matter if Spock simply thought of her as a friend or as much more than that. Someone who was close to Spock was in danger, and Jim didn't want Spock to go through that. Jim didn't want to see that look on Spock's face again—the one he'd had directly after the Vulcan Massacre and during the memorial services. Losing Uhura would hurt Spock. He repeated that thought to himself, knowing it was true and unable to find any fault with it. Jim didn't want to see Spock hurt exponentially more than he wanted Uhura and Spock's relationship to be over. He wouldn't want to see any of his crew hurt, but the idea of standing aside as Spock lost yet another person vital to his happiness was unthinkable. Spock was only just starting to make sense of out of the Vulcan Massacre. It was too soon for him to process more tragedy. Uhura needed to be all right. Spock couldn't handle it any other way.
So Jim was in love. There was no other reason why he would think so unselfishly about this. He had been so close to Spock last night. Now all he could think was that, if he had to spend a lifetime at Spock's side without ever touching him, watching as Spock stayed with Uhura or went into and out of relationships with other people, it would be fine as long as he was able to have moments where he could pretend. He had been able to pretend, last night. With Spock lying next to him, wholly focused on him, it had been easy to pretend. He thought it might get harder as time passed. It was already hard to imagine and he'd only realized a few minutes ago. But he'd deal with that when it came up. Right now, he needed to see if there was anything he could do. Maybe McCoy needed help with—
Then it hit him. McCoy. His best friend in the whole galaxy, wonderful sardonic McCoy, surely he would know what to do. If Jim could gather up the courage to actually speak about his epiphany, McCoy might have some form of advice. It was equally likely that he'd only laugh or hit him, but Jim could hope. Of course, he'd have to wait until he was ready. Jim was sure he loved Spock, he just knew it, somehow, but he wasn't sure enough to tell McCoy and be mocked for it. It was still too new. He needed to think on it a bit, let it cool down before he was prepared to get told off for it. He didn't want to hear he was an idiot for falling in love with someone who was probably unattainable. He just wanted to roll around in it for a while—really suck it up so he could understand what all the hype was about. It was his first time being in love, after all. He was ready to be wowed.
Jim actually was wowed moments later when McCoy shouted that he'd found a possible cure. It was actually a wordless cry of relief, but Jim got it anyway. He looked up to find McCoy holding a vial of liquid and exhaling slowly.
"That it?" Jim asked, quietly. McCoy nodded. "So we just need to test it, right? Find out if it works or not."
"Yeah," McCoy replied. "We need someone who's sick. One of the colonists, I guess."
Jim immediately realized why that wouldn't work. Before he could say anything, though, Uhura spoke up. "I'll take it." Everyone looked at her. "It makes sense," she continued, speaking slower than usual. "If the cure doesn't work, the colonists don't need to know about it. When we find the one that works, we'll let them know we've got it. Until then, if we use them as test subjects they're bound to get even more pissed at us than they already are."
Jim looked at Spock, who was staring at McCoy. Then he looked back at McCoy to find him frowning.
"I don't like it," McCoy said. "I can't be entirely sure what the effects of this drug will be."
"Well, it got rid of the disease in the blood samples you had, right?" Uhura asked.
"Of course," McCoy said, slightly irritated. "I wouldn't bother with it if it hadn't."
"Okay," she replied. "Then use it on me."
"Just do it," Jim said, interrupting any further arguments. "She's right and you know it."
McCoy looked distinctly unhappy with the arrangement, but he still brought over a needle and the vial of medicine to Uhura. Jim watched as McCoy injected her with the liquid, and although he knew it was stupid he still half-expected some kind of immediate reaction to the drug. Uhura jumping up and down, her skin turning blue, her arm exploding—something.
"Now we wait," McCoy said.
So they waited. Every half-hour McCoy took small blood samples from Uhura to check her progress, but by the fifth hour even Jim could see she was feeling better. Her temperature was back to normal and she was walking and speaking at a rate much closer to her usual, although it was still a bit slower. At the end of the sixth hour, McCoy pronounced her cured and that strain of medicine a success—for humans. Immediately McCoy injected himself and Jim with the medicine, and Jim did not struggle against the needle at all because he knew Spock was watching and he was actually quite manly and impressive when he wanted to be.
Spock and McCoy began speaking in low tones about the process to convert that medicine to be fit for use by the colonists and by Vulcans. Jim tuned them out, no longer even able to pretend to be interested in the proceedings. He was done with this planet and with weird space diseases. He'd be more than happy to leave when they were done.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Once Uhura had been cured, it took another twenty-one point two eight hours to make the correct adjustments to the medicine for it to be usable by both the colonists and himself. McCoy gave Spock his version of the medicine. Then he looked at the entrance to the tent warily.
"We need a colonist to test it on," McCoy said.
Uhura nodded and said, "I'll tell them we might have a cure."
Spock listened as Uhura spoke to one of the guards. He was getting the hang of this language. It was difficult because they used far more consonants than he was used to in either language, but he thought he could make out a few of the most often-used words—me, you, us, them, and, sickness, healthy, leader. It would be interesting to study this language, once they were finished with this mission. These people had no words to describe electrical objects, after all. That was a rare find in the galaxy.
Once Uhura had finished speaking, she turned to them and shrugged. "They'll bring somebody over. They say if the cure doesn't work, though, there'll be consequences."
McCoy grit his teeth. "Of course they say that. Of course." He began pacing in short strides. "Here I am, working my ass off all day long to help them, and all they want to do is kill us."
"Bones," Jim said, sighing. He walked over to McCoy and put a hand on his shoulder. "It'll be fine. The cure worked on us. It'll work on them."
Spock didn't want to say the obvious, but McCoy ended up saying it for him. "You don't know that. And if it doesn't work we'll be in ten kinds of shit and it'll be my fault."
"Doctor, you have done everything you can to produce the correct antidote," Spock said. "If there is a fault within the medicine, it would be illogical to blame you for it."
McCoy and Jim both looked at Spock, McCoy surprised and Jim grateful. Spock blinked and raised an eyebrow, once again unsure why his logical statements brought about such odd reactions from humans.
He didn't have long to think about it. A colonist stumbled into the tent—a woman who was clearly far more advanced in her symptoms than Uhura had been. McCoy immediately told her to sit down, and Uhura translated. The woman half-sat and half-fell onto the ground. McCoy gave her the injection, and Spock realized it was a very good thing the woman was barely able to function because otherwise she might have struggled against the needle.
"Now we wait," McCoy said. "Again."
It didn't take long for there to be a reaction. In the first hour she was sitting up straighter, and by the end of the third she was arguing quite vehemently against McCoy's half-hour tests on her blood. After seven hours, McCoy let his head fall on the table. Spock was concerned, but Jim smiled and walked over to McCoy, gently pushing his shoulder against Spock's when he passed by.
"That's it," McCoy said, calmly. "I'm done."
"Good job, Bones." Jim pat him on the head a few times, which earned him a glare. "You've earned a vacation."
"I hear Orion is lovely this time of year," McCoy said, sighing.
"I was thinking more along the lines of a week in bed," Jim said, grinning. He waggled his eyebrows. "You've probably got your choice of the nurses, too, lucky bastard."
McCoy rolled his eyes. "They've all got the hots for this Captain Kirk I've heard so much about. He's supposed to be charming and handsome and all of that, but I've never seen anyone fitting that description." He paused. "Except in the mirror, of course."
"Of course," Jim allowed. He looked over at Uhura then and said, "Can you please tell the guards that we've discovered the cure, but that we need to have our other equipment back and to go back up to our ship to reproduce it in the amount they need."
Uhura nodded. "Happy to, sir." She spoke briefly to the guards, and in minutes they had their communicators and suits back.
Spock was handed out the communicators and began to re-pack his belongings. As Uhura and McCoy did the same, Jim contacted the Enterprise for the first time in almost four days.
"Enterprise, Kirk here. Do you read?"
"Captain Kirk, this is the Enterprise. It's good to hear from you," Sulu said, relief evident in his voice even through the static of the communicator.
"Same here," Jim replied. "Get a lock on our coordinates. We'll be beaming back up shortly. I'll let you know when we're ready."
"Will do," Sulu said.
Jim flipped his communicator shut and looked at the emitter he was standing near, buzzing away on the table, before turning to Spock. "These emitters really came in handy," he said, thoughtfully.
Spock raised his eyebrows. Of course they'd come in handy—he'd made them because otherwise they wouldn't have been able to complete their mission. Was Jim simply thanking him? "Indeed," Spock replied, deeming that to be a safe answer.
"Hm," Jim murmured, nodding. He looked around and saw that Uhura and McCoy were both packing their bags. "Oh, right."
Spock simply watched as the three of them finished collecting their belongings. He was already prepared to leave, but he assisted McCoy in packing all of the medical supplies and equipment. Once they were done, Jim flipped open his communicator and ordered the Enterprise to beam them up. Spock quickly shut off the emitter and held onto it, along with the rest of his supplies, as the world dissolved around him.
When he re-appeared on the Enterprise, he saw Scotty smiling at them. Jim and McCoy walked off the platform first, Uhura trailing close behind.
"You're back." Spock would never understand why humans felt the need state the obvious, but he said nothing to Scotty's illogical comment.
"Thank God," Uhura said, shaking her head. "I'm going to my quarters. I need a shower." She waved at Spock and then left, leaving the rest of them standing there staring after her.
"I'd like to go relax," McCoy said. "But first I have to make enough of this medicine to treat those assholes."
McCoy strode out, still ticked off, and Spock moved to follow him, ready to try and help if he was needed. But Jim held him back, grabbing his elbow and shaking his head. He dropped his hand quickly, which was unusual behavior for Jim, who normally kept his hold of people for at least thirty seconds once he touched them. Spock wondered about it, but decided asking would be strange especially since they were all tired and in a bad mood from the mission.
"So, not a good time, then?" Scotty asked, frowning.
Spock looked at Scotty disapprovingly. "You beamed me into a lake."
"I did?" Scotty asked. He laughed and then bit his lower lip. "I mean, oh, I'm sorry, sir. And I say that with complete sincerity. It won't happen again."
"Don't worry about it," Jim said, offhandedly. "You're getting a raise." Spock raised an eyebrow. Jim turned to look at him. "And you're coming with me for a minute."
"Captain?" Spock asked.
"Don't argue, just come on," Jim said.
They walked towards the door as Scotty said, "Was that a joke? Because I really would like a raise."
"Not a joke," Jim called back as they left the room. "Keep it up and you'll be a rich man, Scotty."
"Nice," Scotty replied.
Spock catalogued the entire conversation as yet another example of human behavior that he would never understand. He followed Jim down the corridor to an empty room, which they both entered. Jim immediately turned to face Spock and said, "Listen, I don't want you to tell Bones about this yet, okay? Because he's still pissed about the colonists and he'll just flip out for no reason."
"What are you talking about, Captain?" Spock asked, hoping Jim would answer and wouldn't just continue speaking assuming Spock could follow his train of thought.
"Those emitters," Jim said. "How many of them could you rig up in the next few hours?"
Spock paused, considering. "It took me three hours to make the last emitter. Now that I have a better grasp on them, I might be able to make one in two hours. That is assuming that the materials are provided, of course."
"Oh, yeah," Jim said. "And do you think you could maybe, I don't know, draw up some plans or something?"
"Plans?" Spock repeated.
"You know, like a diagram that lets other people know how to make them," Jim explained.
"It is quite possible," Spock replied. "I could re-create a virtual model using the computer and—"
"No, no," Jim said, suddenly. "I mean, on paper." He hesitated. "See, I had this idea. You know how we have the cure for the disease, but we don't know what causes it or how it's spread?"
"Yes," Spock answered after a few seconds when it became clear the question was not rhetorical and Jim really did expect an answer. Humans. So intent on stating the obvious.
"Okay," Jim said. "Well, I'm thinking even if we leave enough medicine for the colonists here, the disease might come back or it might keep spreading." He shrugged. "We don't know enough about it yet, and I think if we give them the emitters and the materials to make their own medicine, that would be better than just warping away and hoping it doesn't have a second outbreak. What do you think?"
"I think that is an intelligent plan," Spock replied. He had been considering how the colonists could create more medicine themselves for a while, but he had been hesitant about giving them technological capability. "However, this is a culture that has survived and thrived without technology. Giving them these tools will change their society in ways we cannot imagine," Spock said, attempting to get across his concerns.
"Yeah," Jim said, slowly. "But what else can we do? It's ridiculous to think just because of this planet's atmosphere they've been left without computers and what have you. Plus, we can't expect other ships to come by and keep on doing this kind of thing. This is a section of the galaxy that hardly gets any traffic at all, and even less now, thanks to…" Jim trailed off, gesturing wildly to indicate the lack of ships and officers caused by Nero's attack.
"Captain, I actually do agree that your plan is the only solution," Spock said, one corner of his mouth twitching upwards at Jim's antics. "I only wanted to point out the consequences our actions will have."
"Oh," Jim said. "Well. Okay then. Consequences noted." He scratched the back of his head and sighed. "But I can't think of anything else we can do here. So I'll get Bones to write down how to make the cure, all three versions, I guess, just in case. And the both of you need to update Starfleet's records so they've got all this information in case it comes up again."
"Of course," Spock said, in a way that indicated how ridiculous it was that Jim would even think he needed to tell Spock how to do his job.
Jim grinned. "Right then," he said. "Guess I'm off to go argue with Bones."
Spock went to his quarters for a quick shower and a change of clothes before he began working on drawing out a diagram on how to make the emitter. Once the diagram was complete, he began working on making yet another of these machines that he felt he was getting a bit too good at creating. He made two more before Uhura knocked on the door to his quarters. He let her in, hoping this wasn't a social call since he was in the middle of working.
"Kirk says he's going back down to the planet to talk to Kopel." She shrugged. "He wants me to go with him to translate, but he asked me to come get what you've been working on first."
Spock nodded and walked to where he had left his bags. He emptied one out and placed the two emitters in it, then retrieved the original two emitters and arranged them in the bag as well. He picked up the bag and handed it to Uhura, then rolled up the large paper he had drawn incredibly detailed plans on, using only pictures to show what to do since he knew they spoke different languages. He gave that to her as well.
"There," he said. "That is everything I have. Tell Captain Kirk I will be on the bridge when he returns."
"Okay," Uhura said. She glanced at Spock and then at the floor and then back up at him. "Listen, about you and Kirk…"
"Yes?" Spock asked, after she had not said anything for a few seconds.
"You guys are really…" Uhura struggled for a word.
"Captain Kirk and I are friends," Spock said. He wondered if she really had not already known that. Hadn't he made that clear to her? Was he being too subtle?
She hefted the bag in her hand and shook her head. "No, I mean—yeah, okay. Never mind. I'll see you later."
"All right," Spock replied. She left and Spock realized even if he studied for millions of years, there were some aspects of human behavior that he would truly never understand.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jim's meeting with Kopel lasted for all of five minutes. They beamed back down to the surface of the planet and met with Kopel and his gang of warriors once again. This time, though, they also beamed down with crates full of medicine. They had only been gone just over five hours, but it had been enough time to produce more than enough medicine thanks to the wondrous glory of replicators. Jim loved machines. He really did.
Jim briefly explained to Uhura what he had already told Spock, and she rephrased it to sound more diplomatic. That was fine by Jim. He had no intention of starting a war if he could avoid it.
"He's asking why you would do this," Uhura said. "He doesn't understand why we had the ability to use technology on this planet and we hid it from them."
"Well, they did treat us like prisoners," Jim said, shrugging.
Uhura exchanged a few words, then said, "He says they were wrong to do so. And he wants to thank you for giving them this opportunity."
Jim pointed to one crate. "Tell him to open that one."
Uhura spoke and then one of Kopel's men walked forward and opened the crate. His eyes widened as he picked up a communicator. He spoke quickly and then Uhura said, "They don't understand. They still think they're weapons."
"I know," Jim said. "Explain to them that they're used for communicating. Tell them they've been ignored by the Federation for too long, and they can use these to get in touch with nearby planets and the closest Federation outposts, if they need anything. They'll have to use the emitters, of course, but still."
Uhura nodded. She spoke at length with the colonists, while Jim paid more attention to their body language than to what they were saying. Kopel and his cohorts seemed to relax a bit. One of them was nodding, and another was on the verge of not frowning. Jim sensed the beginning of a beautiful relationship where he could stay far away from them and they could still get what they needed to survive.
Uhura turned to Jim. "They understand why we lied and I actually think they respect you for it. They'd like an explanation about how the emitters work and how to give out the medicine, though."
Jim gestured to Uhura and said, "Well, explain away. You know it all, right?"
Uhura sighed. "Yes, sir." She knelt down to take an emitter out of the bag at her feet, turning it on for the colonists to see. Meanwhile, Jim unrolled the diagram and showed one of the colonists who seemed quite interested in the machine how it worked. After that, they showed how to inject someone with the medicine. Luckily enough, it worked no matter where it was injected into the body, so that was a simple matter of convincing the colonists that sticking themselves with a needle was not going to injure them. Much. Finally, they showed Kopel the smaller plans to create more medicine, which were clear but also complicated and harder to explain.
When they were finished, Jim held his hand out towards Kopel. Uhura spoke briefly, and then Kopel reached out and shook his hand, really tightly in that way that some guys who were overly concerned with appearing manly did. Jim didn't let any discomfort show, and instead squeezed his hand back. They let go and Jim turned on one of the emitters, flipping open his communicator.
"Enterprise, Kirk. Beam us up in five minutes."
"Acknowledged."
Jim closed his communicator and they turned off the emitter. Uhura cautioned the colonists once more about being careful with the emitters and the medicine, and the group left with their new toys, each person carrying one crate while Kopel carried the bag of emitters and the plans to make more.
"Let's hope they don't do anything awful," Uhura said, watching them go.
"Yeah," Jim agreed. "But at least we're done here. And I don't think they're that bad, really. They just need to get out of the stone age."
"Hm," Uhura agreed. She was silent for a few moments, during which time Jim wondered if they'd be standing in awkward silence for the next minute until they were beamed up. "So, you and Spock are pretty close."
It was something, but it definitely wasn't the conversation topic Jim had been expecting. "We're friends," he replied, shrugging.
"So I hear," Uhura said.
Jim looked at her, confused and wondering what the heck that was supposed to mean, before a heavy feeling of paranoia settled over him. Had he given himself away? Already? It had only been a little while since he'd figured it out for himself. Did Uhura have mind-reading powers? Or was this that girl thing where he did something that was completely unnoticeable by other guys but had girls all in fits? But no, it couldn't be either of those. She was probably just trying to talk about something else that Jim couldn't figure out. He was about to ask her, but then they were beamed back on board the ship. She walked out of the transporter room too quickly to try and stop, and Jim stared after her before leaving to go to his quarters. He had what was going to be an annoyingly long Captain's Log entry to make.
A few minutes after he got to his quarters, though, the intercom sounded. Jim pressed the button and Chekov said, "Captain, Admiral Pike would like to speak with you."
Jim sighed. "All right, put him through."
"Jim?" Pike asked.
"Pike," Jim replied. "If you're going to give me another mission, I'll tell you right now that's going to move you to the bottom of my list of favorite commanding officers."
Pike chuckled. "No, no more missions. Yet."
"Thank God," Jim said.
"So it was rough, then?"
"I'll send you the log entry when I'm done with it," Jim replied. "It'll be maybe an hour."
"That's fine," Pike said. He hesitated. "But I didn't call to talk about that."
"I figured," Jim said. "What's happened?" The pause was long enough that Jim wondered if the connection had been broken. "Admiral?"
"I'm here," Pike said. He sighed. "You should know there's been some trouble on New Vulcan."
Jim felt his body tense. "That can't be good. What kind of trouble?"
"The kind of trouble we should have expected but didn't," Pike replied. "There's been some talk among the Vulcans of investigating the Nero incident further, using the Federation's resources to do so, of course."
"I don't get it," Jim said. "Yeah, what happened was horrible. I feel bad for them and all, but… well, Nero's dead. I gave the order so I know. What needs to be investigated?"
"We're not entirely sure what they're going to ask for yet," Pike said. "But some of the higher-ups have been speculating it's going to involve the Romulans."
Jim groaned. "Involve them how?"
"Like I said, we just don't know," Pike stated. "Still, it's better for everyone if we're prepared."
There was a beat of heavy silence where all Jim could think was prepared for what? Then he realized this information was most likely classified or need-to-know and he shouldn't be hearing it. "Why'd you tell me this?" Jim asked, already half-suspecting but wanting to be wrong.
"Come on, Jim," Pike replied. "You know why."
"Let's say I don't so you can tell me anyway," Jim said. There was only one reason why Pike would consider him someone to keep informed on the activities of the Vulcans, and that was a reason he didn't want to consider.
Pike sighed. "I'll contact you again if anything else happens. Everyone's hoping it's going to be just talk, that nothing will come of it."
"You know what they say. Vulcans don't bluff." Jim spoke calmly, but he was already coming to some pretty bad conclusions.
"Neither does Starfleet," Pike said, just as calmly. "I'll keep you updated. Pike out."
Jim turned off the communicator and leaned back in his chair. Was it overly pessimistic to assume the worst, or was it something the military had drilled into him?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Part 7
Feedback is complete awesomesauce! <3
EDIT: B/c HOMGtasty_boots and kroe_quette made an Apogee fanmix!! AN APOGEE FANMIX!! *fangirl flails then iz DED* This excites me beyond all reason and logical thought. Check it out, people! And let them know if you download and like it! THANK YOU, tasty_boots & kroe_quette!! You have my heart. Here it is --> ♥
Author:
kowaiyoukaiRating: R
Pairing: eventual like whoa Kirk/Spock (STFU), Spock/Uhura (blame JJ, not me)
Warning(s): Angst, meta, language, attempts at witty banter, overly-important tone, intentionally confusing parts, potentially OOC everybody
Spoilers: Star Trek XI (2009) (a.k.a. Star Trek XI, Star Trek 2009, Star Trek Reboot, New Trek, and can we please just pick one name for this fandom people?!)
Word Count: 6,624/26,171 (for this part/for all of part 6)
Disclaimer: Star Trek belongs to Gene Roddenberry, mostly, but also a lot of other people/groups like Paramount, J.J. Abrams, and the various writers/directors. I'm not one of those people, sadly, because if I was I'd be filthy rich.
Beta Acknowledgment: None! I know there are errors, so please let me know if you see any! Thanks!
Summary: Jim quickly realized he was going to have to break the rules if he wanted to survive on the Enterprise.
A/N: OMG, let's not discuss the amount of trouble I had with this part. Well, it's done now and THANK GOD FOR THAT. I'm hoping part 7 won't take nearly as long as this did, but with HBP coming out, time'll be short. I've already got plans for the midnight showing, plus at least one other showing this weekend. You guys know how that goes. *is excited*
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Othersides 1 | Part 6a | Part 6b
Spock had no idea that humans were able to get into such contorted positions while deeply unconscious. He had never slept next to anyone before, but he had seen other people sleeping, and none of them had even come close to moving the way Jim did. First of all, Jim's limbs were making a desperate attempt at escaping from his torso. His arms and legs were spread as far as they could go, bent at odd angles as if they could be free if they only kept on twisting. This might have amused Spock under normal conditions. However, Jim had started the night sleeping less than two feet away from him and had somehow managed to end it with half of his body sprawled over Spock. Even that wouldn't have been a huge problem if Jim hadn't been all sharp angles and jerky movements. One of his legs was covering Spock's right leg and had burrowed beneath his left leg, finally ending with Jim's ankle hooked around Spock's leg a few inches below his knee. Both of Jim's arms were in Spock's personal space—one was haphazardly thrown across his torso and the other was obviously meant to be pillowing Jim's head, but of course this ended in disaster with Jim's elbow resting right next to Spock's nose so that every time Spock moved his head he ended up getting poked in the eye.
Spock had no idea how he had ended up like this, since he had gone to sleep and woken up lying in the exact same position. Obviously this was all Jim's fault. Spock wanted to get up to start working on the cure, but Jim was all over him and he wasn't entirely sure how to go about removing the man without waking him up. Sure, he was strong enough to get Jim off him no problem. It was actually difficult not to move in a way that would cause Jim discomfort, given how his leg was tangled in-between Spock's own and his hand seemed content to bury itself in Spock's shirt, fingers twisting around the material.
"'S ho'," Jim mumbled, wriggling uncomfortably.
Spock inhaled and exhaled once, deeply, attempting to remain calm. They were stuck on a desert planet and Jim was pressed against Spock, who had a higher body temperature than humans did. Of course it would be hot for him. Was it really too much to ask for Jim to not make ridiculous comments while sleeping?
"Spock?" McCoy asked, quietly. "You up?"
"Yes, Doctor," Spock replied. "Have you started working on the cure?"
"No, I've been standing here watching you and Jim cuddle," McCoy said, rolling his eyes.
Spock hesitated. He tilted his head at a painful angle for a few seconds until he could make out McCoy bent over the table, working next to the emitter which was happily murmuring away. It was incredibly unlikely that McCoy had been watching them sleep. That comment must have been sarcastic. "I offered to share my blanket with him and he accepted," Spock explained. "It was the only logical course of action since—"
"Sure," McCoy interrupted. "But I don't really care right now. Are you going to help me with this or not?"
"I will assist you in a moment," Spock stated.
It took a few minutes, but Spock was eventually able to disentangle himself from Jim and stand up. He walked over to McCoy, rolling his shoulders, feeling the minor aches of sleeping on the ground get worse as he moved. "How far have you progressed?"
Almost an hour later Uhura woke up. She immediately seemed to move a bit slower than usual, but Spock brushed that off as a mixture of boredom and idleness. With nothing to do and all day to do it, anyone would take their time. She rolled up her blanket and put it away, walking around the tent a few times to amuse herself. Almost an hour after that, Jim finally sat up, stretching and yawning, kicking his feet idly out in front of him. Spock didn't even spare a glance at him, knowing Jim would only take that as permission to interrupt their work with questions designed to alleviate his boredom. Spock and McCoy had made good progress, eliminating over two hundred possible combinations of the medical supplies due to various ill effects or having no effect on the disease, but there were still plenty more to check. They didn't have time to worry about entertaining Jim and Uhura.
As the hours passed, Spock knew he was being of less and less use. He had completed all the steps that McCoy did not need to personally oversee. He didn't have the medical knowledge to run tests on the other samples himself, which left him standing there occasionally handing McCoy something or briefly checking the emitter for potential problems. However, there was nothing else to do in the tent, so unless he felt as though he was impeding McCoy's progress, Spock would stay just in case he was needed.
Or at least, that was his intention. But about two hours after they had eaten lunch, which was a spare helping of the food they had brought with them, Uhura began to behave oddly. She started walking even slower than she had been, pausing before taking each step as though she had to concentrate incredibly hard to do it. After a few minutes she sat down, slumped against her bag, and closed her eyes, breathing irregularly. Spock exchanged a glance with McCoy, then with Jim. McCoy's mouth tightened and he continued to work, concentrating on his task. Jim walked over to Uhura and knelt in front of her, saying something too quietly for Spock to hear. He paused a few moments and then got up and walked to stand next to Spock.
"She wants you," Jim said, shortly. "She's shivering, says she feels cold."
Spock glanced at Jim, but he was looking down at the table, suddenly absorbed in what McCoy was working on. "Uhura requested my presence?"
Jim shuffled his feet. "Not exactly," he hedged. "But you should go anyway. I mean, I know I… well, she wants you there."
"I see," Spock said. He turned to McCoy, who was cursing under his breath, obviously displeased with the result of his last test. "Do you require my assistance here, Doctor?"
"What?" McCoy asked, looking up briefly before going back to his work and waving a hand in Spock's general direction. "No, it's fine, just leave me be."
Spock hesitated, unsure if he would be more helpful helping Uhura or McCoy. Then Jim laid a hand on his arm and said, "Just go, okay? I'll stay here in case Bones needs anything."
Spock nodded and walked over to Uhura, sitting beside her in one swift movement. She leaned against him and he could immediately feel how low her body temperature was. Reaching behind them, Spock grasped the edge of his blanket and pulled it closer, maneuvering so that he was able to wrap her in it. Then he put his arm around her and drew her closer, knowing his own body heat combined with the natural temperature of the planet was the best combination they currently had available to maximize heat.
"You came," Uhura said. "I thought you were working with McCoy."
"I was under the impression you wanted me here," Spock replied.
"I do," she said, slowly. "Thanks. I feel all screwed up."
"Rest for now," Spock said.
Uhura was still shivering against him, but she slowly started to calm down. Spock was already thinking about what he would do if someone else got sick. If it was Jim, it wouldn't be so bad, since Spock could use his other arm and then both of them would get the warmth they needed from him. But McCoy needed to be free to work on the cure, and that would mean Spock would have to choose between them, and that was something he'd rather not consider. Technically, Spock would be able to stand next to McCoy while he worked and put an arm around his shoulders, but Spock also had doubts about just how much work McCoy would be able to get done if he started having the symptoms Uhura was currently showing. With any sort of luck, McCoy would finish the cure soon and they wouldn't even have to worry about it.
Uhura mumbled a little, half-asleep, and Spock decided to let her rest. Nothing could be gained from waking her. Jim was still by the table watching McCoy, although he darted an occasional furtive glance towards them. Spock was able to catch his eye when he was looking their way. He raised an eyebrow interrogatively, but Jim looked quickly away without replying.
Instead of worrying about the rest of them contracting the disease or Jim's confusing behavior, Spock decided to clear his mind and meditate for a while. It would do him a world of good to feel set apart from his problems for an hour or two.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jim had the worst luck in the world. There he was, trying not to get in anyone's way, and all anyone was doing was giving him hassle about it. McCoy kept on glancing at him as though he expected Jim to take the hint and go somewhere else, but there really was no place else to go. The tent was arranged so that facing McCoy was the only place where he wouldn't actually have to look at Spock and Uhura, unless he wanted to stand and stare at the wall for the rest of the day. Which, by the way, he really didn't. He'd take looking at the wall before looking at Spock holding onto Uhura, though. No questions asked.
Sure, he knew he only had himself to blame. Technically, Uhura hadn't even asked him to get Spock for her. But he had known what she wanted when she said she wasn't feeling well. They were dating, so it made sense, and Jim felt a certain sense of kinship with her. If he was in her situation, he'd want Spock to be the one holding him. He couldn't entirely blame her for it.
In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he realized he wasn't actually even all that jealous. Sure, he was a little jealous, because she had what he knew he would never be able to have, but besides that there was really nothing. He liked Uhura and she was sick. He wouldn't begrudge her some comfort now. But even more than that, Jim knew that Spock didn't want to see Uhura like this. Spock had seen enough of his friends and loved ones injured and dying. Jim didn't want him to lose anyone else.
It hit him then—really, truly punched him in the jaw—that he was in love with Spock. Not just lust, not just wanting to have completely heterosexual sex with, but love. He didn't know how it had happened. He hadn't even though it could happen, much less this quickly, but there it was. Obvious, unavoidable, and hanging over him like a blinking neon sign that he felt anyone could read at any moment. That the realization came, oddly enough, thanks to Uhura was surprising but not entirely unexpected. Watching Spock and Uhura sit quietly together in the corner had Jim uneasy. He reminded himself he wasn't all that jealous—because he wasn't, really, and the small amount he was didn't matter enough to mention it. It was that Jim suddenly realized that he truly did not want Uhura to be hurt. He hadn't ever actively wished her harm. She was an outstanding officer and he knew he was lucky to have her in his crew. Yet her relationship with Spock had left him resenting her, even when he tried not to. Now, though, Jim realized that Spock did care for Uhura. It was open to debate how much exactly and what his feelings were, but right now it didn't matter if Spock simply thought of her as a friend or as much more than that. Someone who was close to Spock was in danger, and Jim didn't want Spock to go through that. Jim didn't want to see that look on Spock's face again—the one he'd had directly after the Vulcan Massacre and during the memorial services. Losing Uhura would hurt Spock. He repeated that thought to himself, knowing it was true and unable to find any fault with it. Jim didn't want to see Spock hurt exponentially more than he wanted Uhura and Spock's relationship to be over. He wouldn't want to see any of his crew hurt, but the idea of standing aside as Spock lost yet another person vital to his happiness was unthinkable. Spock was only just starting to make sense of out of the Vulcan Massacre. It was too soon for him to process more tragedy. Uhura needed to be all right. Spock couldn't handle it any other way.
So Jim was in love. There was no other reason why he would think so unselfishly about this. He had been so close to Spock last night. Now all he could think was that, if he had to spend a lifetime at Spock's side without ever touching him, watching as Spock stayed with Uhura or went into and out of relationships with other people, it would be fine as long as he was able to have moments where he could pretend. He had been able to pretend, last night. With Spock lying next to him, wholly focused on him, it had been easy to pretend. He thought it might get harder as time passed. It was already hard to imagine and he'd only realized a few minutes ago. But he'd deal with that when it came up. Right now, he needed to see if there was anything he could do. Maybe McCoy needed help with—
Then it hit him. McCoy. His best friend in the whole galaxy, wonderful sardonic McCoy, surely he would know what to do. If Jim could gather up the courage to actually speak about his epiphany, McCoy might have some form of advice. It was equally likely that he'd only laugh or hit him, but Jim could hope. Of course, he'd have to wait until he was ready. Jim was sure he loved Spock, he just knew it, somehow, but he wasn't sure enough to tell McCoy and be mocked for it. It was still too new. He needed to think on it a bit, let it cool down before he was prepared to get told off for it. He didn't want to hear he was an idiot for falling in love with someone who was probably unattainable. He just wanted to roll around in it for a while—really suck it up so he could understand what all the hype was about. It was his first time being in love, after all. He was ready to be wowed.
Jim actually was wowed moments later when McCoy shouted that he'd found a possible cure. It was actually a wordless cry of relief, but Jim got it anyway. He looked up to find McCoy holding a vial of liquid and exhaling slowly.
"That it?" Jim asked, quietly. McCoy nodded. "So we just need to test it, right? Find out if it works or not."
"Yeah," McCoy replied. "We need someone who's sick. One of the colonists, I guess."
Jim immediately realized why that wouldn't work. Before he could say anything, though, Uhura spoke up. "I'll take it." Everyone looked at her. "It makes sense," she continued, speaking slower than usual. "If the cure doesn't work, the colonists don't need to know about it. When we find the one that works, we'll let them know we've got it. Until then, if we use them as test subjects they're bound to get even more pissed at us than they already are."
Jim looked at Spock, who was staring at McCoy. Then he looked back at McCoy to find him frowning.
"I don't like it," McCoy said. "I can't be entirely sure what the effects of this drug will be."
"Well, it got rid of the disease in the blood samples you had, right?" Uhura asked.
"Of course," McCoy said, slightly irritated. "I wouldn't bother with it if it hadn't."
"Okay," she replied. "Then use it on me."
"Just do it," Jim said, interrupting any further arguments. "She's right and you know it."
McCoy looked distinctly unhappy with the arrangement, but he still brought over a needle and the vial of medicine to Uhura. Jim watched as McCoy injected her with the liquid, and although he knew it was stupid he still half-expected some kind of immediate reaction to the drug. Uhura jumping up and down, her skin turning blue, her arm exploding—something.
"Now we wait," McCoy said.
So they waited. Every half-hour McCoy took small blood samples from Uhura to check her progress, but by the fifth hour even Jim could see she was feeling better. Her temperature was back to normal and she was walking and speaking at a rate much closer to her usual, although it was still a bit slower. At the end of the sixth hour, McCoy pronounced her cured and that strain of medicine a success—for humans. Immediately McCoy injected himself and Jim with the medicine, and Jim did not struggle against the needle at all because he knew Spock was watching and he was actually quite manly and impressive when he wanted to be.
Spock and McCoy began speaking in low tones about the process to convert that medicine to be fit for use by the colonists and by Vulcans. Jim tuned them out, no longer even able to pretend to be interested in the proceedings. He was done with this planet and with weird space diseases. He'd be more than happy to leave when they were done.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Once Uhura had been cured, it took another twenty-one point two eight hours to make the correct adjustments to the medicine for it to be usable by both the colonists and himself. McCoy gave Spock his version of the medicine. Then he looked at the entrance to the tent warily.
"We need a colonist to test it on," McCoy said.
Uhura nodded and said, "I'll tell them we might have a cure."
Spock listened as Uhura spoke to one of the guards. He was getting the hang of this language. It was difficult because they used far more consonants than he was used to in either language, but he thought he could make out a few of the most often-used words—me, you, us, them, and, sickness, healthy, leader. It would be interesting to study this language, once they were finished with this mission. These people had no words to describe electrical objects, after all. That was a rare find in the galaxy.
Once Uhura had finished speaking, she turned to them and shrugged. "They'll bring somebody over. They say if the cure doesn't work, though, there'll be consequences."
McCoy grit his teeth. "Of course they say that. Of course." He began pacing in short strides. "Here I am, working my ass off all day long to help them, and all they want to do is kill us."
"Bones," Jim said, sighing. He walked over to McCoy and put a hand on his shoulder. "It'll be fine. The cure worked on us. It'll work on them."
Spock didn't want to say the obvious, but McCoy ended up saying it for him. "You don't know that. And if it doesn't work we'll be in ten kinds of shit and it'll be my fault."
"Doctor, you have done everything you can to produce the correct antidote," Spock said. "If there is a fault within the medicine, it would be illogical to blame you for it."
McCoy and Jim both looked at Spock, McCoy surprised and Jim grateful. Spock blinked and raised an eyebrow, once again unsure why his logical statements brought about such odd reactions from humans.
He didn't have long to think about it. A colonist stumbled into the tent—a woman who was clearly far more advanced in her symptoms than Uhura had been. McCoy immediately told her to sit down, and Uhura translated. The woman half-sat and half-fell onto the ground. McCoy gave her the injection, and Spock realized it was a very good thing the woman was barely able to function because otherwise she might have struggled against the needle.
"Now we wait," McCoy said. "Again."
It didn't take long for there to be a reaction. In the first hour she was sitting up straighter, and by the end of the third she was arguing quite vehemently against McCoy's half-hour tests on her blood. After seven hours, McCoy let his head fall on the table. Spock was concerned, but Jim smiled and walked over to McCoy, gently pushing his shoulder against Spock's when he passed by.
"That's it," McCoy said, calmly. "I'm done."
"Good job, Bones." Jim pat him on the head a few times, which earned him a glare. "You've earned a vacation."
"I hear Orion is lovely this time of year," McCoy said, sighing.
"I was thinking more along the lines of a week in bed," Jim said, grinning. He waggled his eyebrows. "You've probably got your choice of the nurses, too, lucky bastard."
McCoy rolled his eyes. "They've all got the hots for this Captain Kirk I've heard so much about. He's supposed to be charming and handsome and all of that, but I've never seen anyone fitting that description." He paused. "Except in the mirror, of course."
"Of course," Jim allowed. He looked over at Uhura then and said, "Can you please tell the guards that we've discovered the cure, but that we need to have our other equipment back and to go back up to our ship to reproduce it in the amount they need."
Uhura nodded. "Happy to, sir." She spoke briefly to the guards, and in minutes they had their communicators and suits back.
Spock was handed out the communicators and began to re-pack his belongings. As Uhura and McCoy did the same, Jim contacted the Enterprise for the first time in almost four days.
"Enterprise, Kirk here. Do you read?"
"Captain Kirk, this is the Enterprise. It's good to hear from you," Sulu said, relief evident in his voice even through the static of the communicator.
"Same here," Jim replied. "Get a lock on our coordinates. We'll be beaming back up shortly. I'll let you know when we're ready."
"Will do," Sulu said.
Jim flipped his communicator shut and looked at the emitter he was standing near, buzzing away on the table, before turning to Spock. "These emitters really came in handy," he said, thoughtfully.
Spock raised his eyebrows. Of course they'd come in handy—he'd made them because otherwise they wouldn't have been able to complete their mission. Was Jim simply thanking him? "Indeed," Spock replied, deeming that to be a safe answer.
"Hm," Jim murmured, nodding. He looked around and saw that Uhura and McCoy were both packing their bags. "Oh, right."
Spock simply watched as the three of them finished collecting their belongings. He was already prepared to leave, but he assisted McCoy in packing all of the medical supplies and equipment. Once they were done, Jim flipped open his communicator and ordered the Enterprise to beam them up. Spock quickly shut off the emitter and held onto it, along with the rest of his supplies, as the world dissolved around him.
When he re-appeared on the Enterprise, he saw Scotty smiling at them. Jim and McCoy walked off the platform first, Uhura trailing close behind.
"You're back." Spock would never understand why humans felt the need state the obvious, but he said nothing to Scotty's illogical comment.
"Thank God," Uhura said, shaking her head. "I'm going to my quarters. I need a shower." She waved at Spock and then left, leaving the rest of them standing there staring after her.
"I'd like to go relax," McCoy said. "But first I have to make enough of this medicine to treat those assholes."
McCoy strode out, still ticked off, and Spock moved to follow him, ready to try and help if he was needed. But Jim held him back, grabbing his elbow and shaking his head. He dropped his hand quickly, which was unusual behavior for Jim, who normally kept his hold of people for at least thirty seconds once he touched them. Spock wondered about it, but decided asking would be strange especially since they were all tired and in a bad mood from the mission.
"So, not a good time, then?" Scotty asked, frowning.
Spock looked at Scotty disapprovingly. "You beamed me into a lake."
"I did?" Scotty asked. He laughed and then bit his lower lip. "I mean, oh, I'm sorry, sir. And I say that with complete sincerity. It won't happen again."
"Don't worry about it," Jim said, offhandedly. "You're getting a raise." Spock raised an eyebrow. Jim turned to look at him. "And you're coming with me for a minute."
"Captain?" Spock asked.
"Don't argue, just come on," Jim said.
They walked towards the door as Scotty said, "Was that a joke? Because I really would like a raise."
"Not a joke," Jim called back as they left the room. "Keep it up and you'll be a rich man, Scotty."
"Nice," Scotty replied.
Spock catalogued the entire conversation as yet another example of human behavior that he would never understand. He followed Jim down the corridor to an empty room, which they both entered. Jim immediately turned to face Spock and said, "Listen, I don't want you to tell Bones about this yet, okay? Because he's still pissed about the colonists and he'll just flip out for no reason."
"What are you talking about, Captain?" Spock asked, hoping Jim would answer and wouldn't just continue speaking assuming Spock could follow his train of thought.
"Those emitters," Jim said. "How many of them could you rig up in the next few hours?"
Spock paused, considering. "It took me three hours to make the last emitter. Now that I have a better grasp on them, I might be able to make one in two hours. That is assuming that the materials are provided, of course."
"Oh, yeah," Jim said. "And do you think you could maybe, I don't know, draw up some plans or something?"
"Plans?" Spock repeated.
"You know, like a diagram that lets other people know how to make them," Jim explained.
"It is quite possible," Spock replied. "I could re-create a virtual model using the computer and—"
"No, no," Jim said, suddenly. "I mean, on paper." He hesitated. "See, I had this idea. You know how we have the cure for the disease, but we don't know what causes it or how it's spread?"
"Yes," Spock answered after a few seconds when it became clear the question was not rhetorical and Jim really did expect an answer. Humans. So intent on stating the obvious.
"Okay," Jim said. "Well, I'm thinking even if we leave enough medicine for the colonists here, the disease might come back or it might keep spreading." He shrugged. "We don't know enough about it yet, and I think if we give them the emitters and the materials to make their own medicine, that would be better than just warping away and hoping it doesn't have a second outbreak. What do you think?"
"I think that is an intelligent plan," Spock replied. He had been considering how the colonists could create more medicine themselves for a while, but he had been hesitant about giving them technological capability. "However, this is a culture that has survived and thrived without technology. Giving them these tools will change their society in ways we cannot imagine," Spock said, attempting to get across his concerns.
"Yeah," Jim said, slowly. "But what else can we do? It's ridiculous to think just because of this planet's atmosphere they've been left without computers and what have you. Plus, we can't expect other ships to come by and keep on doing this kind of thing. This is a section of the galaxy that hardly gets any traffic at all, and even less now, thanks to…" Jim trailed off, gesturing wildly to indicate the lack of ships and officers caused by Nero's attack.
"Captain, I actually do agree that your plan is the only solution," Spock said, one corner of his mouth twitching upwards at Jim's antics. "I only wanted to point out the consequences our actions will have."
"Oh," Jim said. "Well. Okay then. Consequences noted." He scratched the back of his head and sighed. "But I can't think of anything else we can do here. So I'll get Bones to write down how to make the cure, all three versions, I guess, just in case. And the both of you need to update Starfleet's records so they've got all this information in case it comes up again."
"Of course," Spock said, in a way that indicated how ridiculous it was that Jim would even think he needed to tell Spock how to do his job.
Jim grinned. "Right then," he said. "Guess I'm off to go argue with Bones."
Spock went to his quarters for a quick shower and a change of clothes before he began working on drawing out a diagram on how to make the emitter. Once the diagram was complete, he began working on making yet another of these machines that he felt he was getting a bit too good at creating. He made two more before Uhura knocked on the door to his quarters. He let her in, hoping this wasn't a social call since he was in the middle of working.
"Kirk says he's going back down to the planet to talk to Kopel." She shrugged. "He wants me to go with him to translate, but he asked me to come get what you've been working on first."
Spock nodded and walked to where he had left his bags. He emptied one out and placed the two emitters in it, then retrieved the original two emitters and arranged them in the bag as well. He picked up the bag and handed it to Uhura, then rolled up the large paper he had drawn incredibly detailed plans on, using only pictures to show what to do since he knew they spoke different languages. He gave that to her as well.
"There," he said. "That is everything I have. Tell Captain Kirk I will be on the bridge when he returns."
"Okay," Uhura said. She glanced at Spock and then at the floor and then back up at him. "Listen, about you and Kirk…"
"Yes?" Spock asked, after she had not said anything for a few seconds.
"You guys are really…" Uhura struggled for a word.
"Captain Kirk and I are friends," Spock said. He wondered if she really had not already known that. Hadn't he made that clear to her? Was he being too subtle?
She hefted the bag in her hand and shook her head. "No, I mean—yeah, okay. Never mind. I'll see you later."
"All right," Spock replied. She left and Spock realized even if he studied for millions of years, there were some aspects of human behavior that he would truly never understand.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jim's meeting with Kopel lasted for all of five minutes. They beamed back down to the surface of the planet and met with Kopel and his gang of warriors once again. This time, though, they also beamed down with crates full of medicine. They had only been gone just over five hours, but it had been enough time to produce more than enough medicine thanks to the wondrous glory of replicators. Jim loved machines. He really did.
Jim briefly explained to Uhura what he had already told Spock, and she rephrased it to sound more diplomatic. That was fine by Jim. He had no intention of starting a war if he could avoid it.
"He's asking why you would do this," Uhura said. "He doesn't understand why we had the ability to use technology on this planet and we hid it from them."
"Well, they did treat us like prisoners," Jim said, shrugging.
Uhura exchanged a few words, then said, "He says they were wrong to do so. And he wants to thank you for giving them this opportunity."
Jim pointed to one crate. "Tell him to open that one."
Uhura spoke and then one of Kopel's men walked forward and opened the crate. His eyes widened as he picked up a communicator. He spoke quickly and then Uhura said, "They don't understand. They still think they're weapons."
"I know," Jim said. "Explain to them that they're used for communicating. Tell them they've been ignored by the Federation for too long, and they can use these to get in touch with nearby planets and the closest Federation outposts, if they need anything. They'll have to use the emitters, of course, but still."
Uhura nodded. She spoke at length with the colonists, while Jim paid more attention to their body language than to what they were saying. Kopel and his cohorts seemed to relax a bit. One of them was nodding, and another was on the verge of not frowning. Jim sensed the beginning of a beautiful relationship where he could stay far away from them and they could still get what they needed to survive.
Uhura turned to Jim. "They understand why we lied and I actually think they respect you for it. They'd like an explanation about how the emitters work and how to give out the medicine, though."
Jim gestured to Uhura and said, "Well, explain away. You know it all, right?"
Uhura sighed. "Yes, sir." She knelt down to take an emitter out of the bag at her feet, turning it on for the colonists to see. Meanwhile, Jim unrolled the diagram and showed one of the colonists who seemed quite interested in the machine how it worked. After that, they showed how to inject someone with the medicine. Luckily enough, it worked no matter where it was injected into the body, so that was a simple matter of convincing the colonists that sticking themselves with a needle was not going to injure them. Much. Finally, they showed Kopel the smaller plans to create more medicine, which were clear but also complicated and harder to explain.
When they were finished, Jim held his hand out towards Kopel. Uhura spoke briefly, and then Kopel reached out and shook his hand, really tightly in that way that some guys who were overly concerned with appearing manly did. Jim didn't let any discomfort show, and instead squeezed his hand back. They let go and Jim turned on one of the emitters, flipping open his communicator.
"Enterprise, Kirk. Beam us up in five minutes."
"Acknowledged."
Jim closed his communicator and they turned off the emitter. Uhura cautioned the colonists once more about being careful with the emitters and the medicine, and the group left with their new toys, each person carrying one crate while Kopel carried the bag of emitters and the plans to make more.
"Let's hope they don't do anything awful," Uhura said, watching them go.
"Yeah," Jim agreed. "But at least we're done here. And I don't think they're that bad, really. They just need to get out of the stone age."
"Hm," Uhura agreed. She was silent for a few moments, during which time Jim wondered if they'd be standing in awkward silence for the next minute until they were beamed up. "So, you and Spock are pretty close."
It was something, but it definitely wasn't the conversation topic Jim had been expecting. "We're friends," he replied, shrugging.
"So I hear," Uhura said.
Jim looked at her, confused and wondering what the heck that was supposed to mean, before a heavy feeling of paranoia settled over him. Had he given himself away? Already? It had only been a little while since he'd figured it out for himself. Did Uhura have mind-reading powers? Or was this that girl thing where he did something that was completely unnoticeable by other guys but had girls all in fits? But no, it couldn't be either of those. She was probably just trying to talk about something else that Jim couldn't figure out. He was about to ask her, but then they were beamed back on board the ship. She walked out of the transporter room too quickly to try and stop, and Jim stared after her before leaving to go to his quarters. He had what was going to be an annoyingly long Captain's Log entry to make.
A few minutes after he got to his quarters, though, the intercom sounded. Jim pressed the button and Chekov said, "Captain, Admiral Pike would like to speak with you."
Jim sighed. "All right, put him through."
"Jim?" Pike asked.
"Pike," Jim replied. "If you're going to give me another mission, I'll tell you right now that's going to move you to the bottom of my list of favorite commanding officers."
Pike chuckled. "No, no more missions. Yet."
"Thank God," Jim said.
"So it was rough, then?"
"I'll send you the log entry when I'm done with it," Jim replied. "It'll be maybe an hour."
"That's fine," Pike said. He hesitated. "But I didn't call to talk about that."
"I figured," Jim said. "What's happened?" The pause was long enough that Jim wondered if the connection had been broken. "Admiral?"
"I'm here," Pike said. He sighed. "You should know there's been some trouble on New Vulcan."
Jim felt his body tense. "That can't be good. What kind of trouble?"
"The kind of trouble we should have expected but didn't," Pike replied. "There's been some talk among the Vulcans of investigating the Nero incident further, using the Federation's resources to do so, of course."
"I don't get it," Jim said. "Yeah, what happened was horrible. I feel bad for them and all, but… well, Nero's dead. I gave the order so I know. What needs to be investigated?"
"We're not entirely sure what they're going to ask for yet," Pike said. "But some of the higher-ups have been speculating it's going to involve the Romulans."
Jim groaned. "Involve them how?"
"Like I said, we just don't know," Pike stated. "Still, it's better for everyone if we're prepared."
There was a beat of heavy silence where all Jim could think was prepared for what? Then he realized this information was most likely classified or need-to-know and he shouldn't be hearing it. "Why'd you tell me this?" Jim asked, already half-suspecting but wanting to be wrong.
"Come on, Jim," Pike replied. "You know why."
"Let's say I don't so you can tell me anyway," Jim said. There was only one reason why Pike would consider him someone to keep informed on the activities of the Vulcans, and that was a reason he didn't want to consider.
Pike sighed. "I'll contact you again if anything else happens. Everyone's hoping it's going to be just talk, that nothing will come of it."
"You know what they say. Vulcans don't bluff." Jim spoke calmly, but he was already coming to some pretty bad conclusions.
"Neither does Starfleet," Pike said, just as calmly. "I'll keep you updated. Pike out."
Jim turned off the communicator and leaned back in his chair. Was it overly pessimistic to assume the worst, or was it something the military had drilled into him?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Part 7
Feedback is complete awesomesauce! <3
EDIT: B/c HOMG
tasty_boots and kroe_quette made an Apogee fanmix!! AN APOGEE FANMIX!! *fangirl flails then iz DED* This excites me beyond all reason and logical thought. Check it out, people! And let them know if you download and like it! THANK YOU, tasty_boots & kroe_quette!! You have my heart. Here it is --> ♥
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no subject
Date: 2009-07-21 07:16 pm (UTC)You know, your first paragraph made me realizse something important. I think I don't encounter that much anti-K/S and general homophobic nonsense b/c I don't have the internet. All of the people I know IRL get shouted at if they try that bullshit, and they really never do b/c I'm fairly obvious and loud about my viewpoints. But due to my limited internet time at the library, I never "waste time" when I'm bored by going online and looking at general message boards. So I end up sticking on LJ or just talking to people I know, and of course I never get any crap there. So, from your perspective (which must be the perspective of everybody else in the world who's got a computer too *headdesk*), I can see why the Analyzation project is important for pointing out the subtext that's OBVIOUSLY in TOS.
I think K/S is basically THE most canon ship in TOS. And I've heard many people say that GR and the cast were all either pro-K/S or neutral to it. Which is also important. So knowing that there's a lot of homophobiz and general dissing of K/S in ST fandom is not only mind-boggling and incredibly insulting, but also an example of just blatant ignorance and inability to see past a person's prejudices. It's sad people still think that way, seriously. :(
As for JKR's idiocy, I agree with everything you said and there are really no words to expres my immediate and all-consuming rage at that comment. The first time I read it, I was at a computer in my college and I literally shoved my rolly-chair away from the table and said "WHAT THE FUCK?!?!" so loudly that everyone looked at me. And I was so ticked off that I wasn't even embarrassed about it. Which is saying something, really.
LOL, I LOVED "The Golden Compass" and that whole series. Still getting through the last one, though--the past few years I keep putting it down and never picking it back up. D: But regardless, yes, I think Pullman's a great example of an author who is open to different interpretations and in fact leaves the text open as well. Any author worth their salt knows that you can't control what a reader thinks, and that attempting to do so is not only a futile endeavor but also sort of manipulative and off-putting. OMG, I forgot that she's also mocked the Snape's a vampie theory--I actually did think it was fairly ridiculous, personally, but I also thought those fans had some excellent points to be made that would be hard to overlook to any careful reader.
Wikipedia's article on reader-response theory (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reader-response_criticism) describes it better than I ever could. The first time I encountered the term as an undergrad freshman, I realized I'd been a reader-response theorist my whole life and just hadn't ever known there was a term for it. :P You should check the whole article out if you're interested/have the time.
I lost respect for JKR and for Harry/Ginny fans after that interview. B/c not only was JKR being an asshole about H/Hr, but H/G fans were pointing to it and saying, "Ha! See? We're right and everyone else is wrong! Nya nya nya!" It was absurdly immature and I ended up just backing out of every HP fandom site I was on except the H/D-focused ones. *headdesk* I think most non-H/G shippers had a similar experience after that. D:
Any attempt fans made at showing a pairing other than R/Hr and H/G was ALWAYS backed up by hard evidence and other examples of relationships in literature. That was one of the reasons I really became annoyed at both R/Hr and H/G fans. They thought it was incredibly obvious their ships were canon and that they didn't need to make an attempt to prove it. I mean, I semi-ship R/Hr (even though I hate Ron and Hermione deserves so much better, she really does), but I wouldn't say that without knowing how to back it up with evidence from the text! In fact, the reason I got into H/D was because those arguments were the most convincing to me and I found them impossible to refute on both a logical and an emotional level.
LOL, I totally think you're a reader-response theorist. Most intelligent people are. \o/
/OMG FUCKING LONG RANT DDD:
no subject
Date: 2009-07-24 01:07 am (UTC)YOU SMART PERSON, YOU. Seriously, the internet is made of so much fail, sometimes. Personally being queer myself makes people avoid that nonsense around me (unless they want a smack-down of epic proportions), but the internet makes me go D:. It's depressing.
I can't say that EVERY ST forum is homophobic. Like with H/D, you'll have some places that don't give a damn, and then others that will seriously get irate about it for just an icon or a vague mention. But there are major ST fandom players that are VERY anti-K/S, like some former writers for the show (not the main ones, strangely enough), or long-time fans who will seriously get on anyone's case about it. Paramount was also not-too-friendly, and I think they are partially responsible for the footnote Gene wrote in the TMP novel. I don't know - it's all about politics, I think. And heteronormativity on a flagrant scale.
I guess I bring it up because there's the SEE Movement going around LJ, and it's getting a lot of flack. They want Paramount to legitimize K/S in the Reboot movies, so OF COURSE the Spock/Uhura shippers are trying to bring the smack-down (and the wank). It also doesn't help (and I'll include myself in this) that there are K/S shippers who are afraid of bringing it up; although Orci and Kurtzmann are monitoring the fanbase and probably know we want it. But it is bringing the whole "Actually, you were never canon..." argument from the anti-K/S again, and that is distressing. It would be one thing if it was limited to those posts and conversations - which I try to avoid like the plague - but vague mentions now are like, "Why? Not like you're canon." *headdesk*.
On one hand it's frustrating, and on the other it's amusing to see S/U shippers so intimidated by us. I oscillate between wickedly rubbing my hands and face-palming on a regular basis.
B/c not only was JKR being an asshole about H/Hr, but H/G fans were pointing to it and saying, "Ha! See? We're right and everyone else is wrong! Nya nya nya!"
To be fair, H/Hr shippers could be just as bad. But at least we never trolled their websites to say it. (We just wrote amazing essays that said it, more or less.)
That wiki article is amazing, because I've always had a problem with people who just... I don't know, take things at face value. If an author says something is so, some just swallow and regurgitate it without thinking; and that's distressing. Gods forbid if I get published, and I have a similar readership. I never graduated from college, so that term is entirely new to me (obviously), so thanks for the article. ♥
I semi-ship R/Hr (even though I hate Ron and Hermione deserves so much better, she really does)
Gods, I hate all of the Weasleys. Which is blasphemous to say usually, but I can't help it. I find Ron to be such a fucking moron; and that's awful because he didn't have to wind up that way. He was totally bad-ass in strategy in Sorcerer's Stone, and then JKR just dropped that awesomeness like a bad habit for the remaining books. I acknowledge that he's suppose to be "the everyman", but I kind of hate that character in literature, anyway. I think he was generally useless; and put in the books (like all of the Weasleys) out of wish-fulfillment on her part. (Ron apparently is modeled after a best friend of hers... Hmm.)
As for H/D, I'll be perfectly honest: Harry came off as so gay to me the first three books, that I always kind of wondered why people were surprised at the slash. Actually, I was surprised at him liking Cho for that reason. There is so much allegory for homosexuality in the books that it's almost ridiculous. I haven't read any H/D essays, but damn it doesn't take a genius to see it, in my opinion (kind of like K/S). Again, it's all heteronormativity that makes people scoff at it. Boo.
/OMG FUCKING LONG RANT DDD:
Dude, I haven't had this awesome of conversation in a long while. Thanks. :)
no subject
Date: 2009-07-25 04:47 am (UTC)Well, I'm obviously queer according to everyone I talk to. LOL! So people tend not to be homophobic around me b/c I'm also loud and willing to lay the smack down. XD
I think the footnote, which I've actually read before (including that site), actually is ambiguous enough to not get rid of the idea of canon K/S--and that chick's explanation of it was awesome. But I think ST canon was clear that K/S was always an option--and anyone who has ever studied psychology, literature, history, philosophy, or any other subject which requires in-depth thought and analysis would have to agree or else be able to hold their own in an hours-long argument.
I'm not afraid of bringing K/S up, and actually I'd LOVE to see it legitimized in the reboot for a lot of reasons that have basically nothing to do with being a K/S shipper. Actually, I'd love to see Kirk and McCoy getting together, too, for the same reasons. I am of the serious opinion that we need more queer heroes in fiction--and that those heroes need to be non-comedic and have happy endings, and that they need to star in mainstream works. I mean, sure, there are movies, books, etc. in the queer community which have realistic queer heroes, but that doesn't mean it has any true relevance to a mainstream audience at all. Those kinds of works are great, but they don't address the main problem of bringing out positive (by that, I mean well-liked and well-received) queer characters in popular works. Actually, on a tangent, all of the original novel series I'm working on have non-heterosexual main characters for this particular reason. Anyway, I think that ship wars in general take our focus away from what's really important. If Paramount won't listen to slashers, who cares? We should be creating our own works and marketing them ourselves, b/c then we'll have characters we like who we will be able to control and make as queer as we want to.
LOL, I've thought too much about that. Um, blame the original novel? *shrugs*
I'm glad you liked the article! I do think reader-response theory is the most important theory going around today, although obviously queer theory would be something to look into as well. Also, you mentioned you're looking to get published... so do you have something finished? CAN I SEE IT?!?! :P
no subject
Date: 2009-07-29 03:21 am (UTC)I absolutely ADORE the footnote. Like crazy. However it does make K/S look invalidated on the out-set, even though I thoroughly agree with you and the essay author. It's just... more crap I have to wade through when discussing it with het shippers. With the way Gene wrote it, I can't help but feel like he was face-palming the entire time, as well. But he loved double-speak, so I think he was able to appeal to his detractors, but still give a wink to us. (GO GENE GO!)
I guess about being afraid to bring it up: I honest-to-God feel like we're going there already in the Reboot. I don't think it'll be explicit, but I think it'll be like TOS in the ambiguity department, which is what I think Paramount is willing to give us. Just from what Chris Pine, Zoe Saldana, and the scriptwriters have said about the "friendship" between Kirk and Spock, I feel like it's all code for the shippers. Maybe I'm delusional, but Chris even said it's about "two men learning to love each other". I feel like the actors are ready, it's just the material being approved. (I have a lot of theories on this personally, but that's probably digressing.)
I totally agree about needing queer (and likable) main characters, and how important that is. But personally, I guess I have a fear that if we push Paramount to make it official, that they'll retreat the opposite way, and cause more damage on that front. Everyone is willing on the creative end, it's just the purse-strings, in my opinion. I would LOVE it to be official, and it would be ground-breaking and amazing in so many ways - I would be so freakin' proud. But seeing Paramount's history... I just... I'm skeptical about them. :( I don't want them to strip the canon-subtext to appease a backlash; which is my worst fear. I almost feel like it would be detrimental to what K/S are, historically, in TOS. Just more ammunition at my heavy heart. (This is what ship wars do to a person, LOL. Although you certainly have a point that ship wars "miss the point", of course.)
But with that being said: OMG YOU WRITE ORIGINAL FICTION?! This makes me happy. I adore your writing, so I'm sure it's awesome. How far along are you? Is it shareable? *crosses fingers* Actually, I was going to ask if you had links to your H/D essays. Does a person need to grovel, or are you benevolent? ;)
I am SOFREAKINGCLOSEOMG with my fiction; it is frustrating. Six years, man. Six years I've been working on this one difficult bitch. *shakes fist at it* It is unfortunately all het - but hey, they came that way, what can I say? ;) (I try not to hold it against them.) I have this horrible habit of reveling in the rush of the first draft - stream-of-conciousness unedited crap - and then letting it go. I have about... three books that way, I guess. Several short stories. All unedited. I should really get my ass in gear, especially since I want to be a rich and famous writer. (Okay, a "writer" would do for me, honestly.) I have a lot of queer characters in my other works, but I'm not drawn to the well-adjusted kind. I'm more about not drawing differences between sexualities, rather than pointing and going, "OMG, look, they're gay!" about it. I'm not sure if that helps the movement in the slightest, but it is what makes me happy, and what I tend to write. A part of me likes the concept of establishing a normality and non-plussed attitude about sexuality, rather than creating an elephant in the room. (Does that make sense?)
Part of my problem might be not thinking about the gay thing enough. It was never any big deal to me, although I miss having heroes in media that I can look up to.
no subject
Date: 2009-07-29 06:43 am (UTC)I agree with you about the footnote. It works as evidence both ways--for K/S and non-K/S fans alike--which is incredibly hard to do. But I often feel like discussing ANYTHING with het shippers is like beating yourself in the head with a brick repeatedly. You could stop the pain at any time, but you don't, because you're always hoping the brick might change. XP Not all of them, of course, I have some het ships myself. But you know the kind of people I mean.
UM, WHEN DID CHRIS SAY THAT?! I HAVE NOT HEARD OF THIS BEFORE. *is a bad Pinto shipper* Oh I googled it and found a quote, but not the whole thing. *le sigh* Anyway, creative types tend to be more open-minded about everything, and I know a lot of people IRL who are in acting/writing/art/music/etc. and couldn't give a shit about defining themselves sexually. *shrugs* So we can all blame the studios.
Honestly, I don't know anything about Paramount's history, but I'll say this. Any studio or company that makes a series more het to get rid of the gay undertones is retarded, SIMPLY BECAUSE obviously fandom exists and will still be shouting about it regardless of what they do. But I agree that I'd rather subtext than nothing at all, and that an actual relationship would be marvelous. :DDD
LOL! OMG yes I do write original fiction! It is shareable, although I'm not that far along at all. Apogee's way longer than what I'm currently working on--I've got a few novels b/c that's how I roll, but there's one in particular that I'm really pushing to get done by the end of the year. I'd like to get an agent as soon as it's done and look to publishing ASAP--this novel series is incredibly set in the current period, and I worry that the references will lose their humor over time. I do not have links to my H/D essays b/c they're not online, but I really should FIND them and PUT them online. I'll have to do that and get back to you. I actually am benevolent but I also accept groveling--it's win/win! So message me with you e-mail if you want to see what I've got so far, and you can give me your brutal criticism which I will then cry in a corner over for days on end. XD
BTW, you're already a writer. What you want to be is a PUBLISHED writer. There's a difference. Me, I'm planning on being rich, but not famous. I'll settle for a small, select group of awesome fans who write fic for my characters--that's what I want. \o/ So if you feel like letting me look over it, I'll be more than happy too! Although I take a while editing/opining on stuff b/c I'm wordy. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!?! Also, Apogee eats my time. *headdesk*
I think you might like my original characters a lot. *crosses fingers*
no subject
Date: 2009-07-30 05:36 am (UTC)Can we add that the bricks have spikes that stab you in the eye? I don't know, they give me piercing headaches.
Chris said that quote in the May issue of Parade magazine. The end of the quote talks about friendship, but seriously - I think the cast knows how deep Kirk and Spock run. "Friendship" is a very tame way of putting it (and I almost think that Chris added it as an after-thought.) Chris has also said that the closest he got to a romance in the movie was with "this guy" (as he pointed to Zach). I don't think the slash community is new to them, and I think Chris has a fun time with it. Zoe has also referred to the "friendship" between Kirk and Spock as "special" - I seriously think "friendship" is a code-word to them. The way they (Zoe and Chris) said it sounds like it has invisible air quotes to me, I don't know. (But I'm a delusional shipper, so what do I know?)
The screenwriters have Gene's story bible; and Gene has said that "they" (him and the other regular writers) intentionally wrote Kirk and Spock as "two halves of the same whole". When I watched the movie, I can't help but think the screenwriters had this in mind, and maybe it was part of Gene's story bible. You said something in a different comment about how Bones and Uhura are Kirk and Spock's respective support systems before they met each other, which I think is a very good point. In this 'verse they needed to be prepared for each other differently, and I think the screenwriters had that exact idea. Paramount MAY have changed - I don't know. The way Gene insisted on it, and the actors were always friendly towards it, made it seem like it's just politics. Is the climate okay for K/S, now? I don't think all the baby boomers are dead; and they are rumored to be mostly responsible for Prop 8 passing (which is WEIRD to me, considering the awesomeness of the 60's.) So... yeah. I believe it's just up to Paramount at this point - whom I agree are idiotic for doing the het thing if they honestly THINK that they can quell the K/S people. But a part of me thinks they're not... I don't know. I love Bones and Uhura, but they were not given the same important emphasis.
(I think my last straw about canon Reboot K/S was during one of the final scenes with Kirk and Spock discussing the Narada - and their faces are illuminated by a RED MOTHERFUCKING GLOW on the bridge. I'm like, "SERIOUSLY, J.J.?!" That man is either OBLIVIOUS about that - or is on our side. When the DVD comes out, I can't wait to compare that lighting to Spock/Uhura's... the turbolift was very white and sterile, if I remember correctly. Hmm. For a guy who loves lensflare, I just... can't believe he'd let shit like that slip, that's all.)
I'd totally love to see your original fiction! ♥ Incidentally, I have a four-day vacation this weekend, so I could totally get around to it ASAP. (It's either that, or staring at Chapter 32 of Home for hours on-end... which, no matter how much I logically try to tell myself, it will not magically update by me staring at it. Boo.)
There's a website called Critique Circle which is really great for edits, but TOTALLY MADE ME CRY LIKE A LITTLE GIRL PUNCHED IN THE CHEST. For real. (I took a six-month break on my novel because of it... PRICKS.) I am more character-motivated and orientated, so I can't say I'm great about plot or anything... but I'm wordy and try to be helpful. ♥ I'm not about ripping a person's heart out, or anything, so... no worries. :)
Email: gwenhwyfear at hotmail dot com. SUCK IT, BOTS.
"Rich" would be awesome - I have student loans to pay. But yeah, I think the ultimate reward as a writer would be fanfiction for my stories... sigh. As for my stuff: I'll totally send you some. I have a BORING AS HELL first chapter that I hate like whoa, and would love direction on. I'd just like to add stuff to it first, and then I'll send it over and go D:.
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Date: 2009-07-30 07:27 pm (UTC)LOL, yeah, I think you're right about the whole "friendship" thing. Although now I am absolutely DYING to know when Chris pointed to Zach as the closest person Kirk had a romance with in XI. \o/ I think the actors would have to be either very delusional or very obstinate to not see K/S.
I do feel that Bones and Uhura are meant to be the prequels, if you will, to Kirk and Spock's epic romance of gay love. That doesn't mean I entirely think XI will go that way, b/c as you said, who knows what Paramount will decide to do.
LMFAO!! I didn't even connect the lighting styles in that way. OMG, you must meta this once you get a chance. The world must know! \o/
LOL, I still haven't read Home. I may or may not eventually get around to it. Apogee is taking up my life right now, and when I'm done with that (whenever the fuck THAT will be), I've got to work more on my original. So I did send you my story and let me know if you didn't get it--I know some spam filters can be pretty intense. XP
I like to get as nasty critique as I can, b/c then I know what the worst shit is people will say about my stuff. When I know what's the worst, it usually helps me to improve everything. *shrugs* Although I have been known to rant for hours on end when people have given me feedback I didn't agree with. -_-;;
LMFAO! ♥
I am SO EXCITED to see your stuff! I'm mean, I'll say it now, but in a friendly sort of way. For instance, I've been known to say things like, "You know I love you, but this paragraph is shit." XD
... I need more writing icons. *headdesk* But this one is so EPIC!! \o/
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Date: 2009-07-31 12:38 am (UTC)This vid, at 5:09. He doesn't point, but he DOES say that he is "very contented with that". ♥ (Why did I think he pointed? I don't know...)
LMFAO!! I didn't even connect the lighting styles in that way. OMG, you must meta this once you get a chance. The world must know! \o/
YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS I WILL. Because I am a glutton for punishment, I guess... but yeah, I find it peculiar that a man that obsessed with lighting would just, I don't know, NOT KNOW THE SYMBOLISM BEHIND A RED GLOW. But I've only seen the movie once, so perhaps it's for something stupid like anger or intensity, I don't know.
I still haven't read Home. I may or may not eventually get around to it.
Great story, but the author's computer broke down, so it's been several weeks without an update. It makes me a sad panda. :(
If I spent half the amount of time I spent reading fic to actually writing, I would probably be published by now. JUST SAYING. So you're a smart cookie, obviously. (Plus I need Apogee in my life, or else I am sad panda x 2. :( )
Criticism is easier said than taken, surely. I mean, I am of the opinion that the story should definitely come before my feelings, and honestly I don't cry easily. But damn, does it suck when unhelpful criticism gets under my skin. It's one thing if someone can be like, "This sucks because of this, this, and this"; because there's always the potential to fix it, and more often than not I know it, and appreciate the advice. But I don't dig criticism that's just meant to attack the author - I'm done with that playground bullying shit, really. It's a little immature. I just... call me sensitive in that case, I guess. That would be "mean" in my opinion, and not really in the interest of bettering someone's writing, you know? I'm all about being helpful.
... Man, that makes me sound really childish. I guess what I'm trying to say is: Be "mean" all you want about my structure, my characters, my plot. That is certainly beneficial, and it certainly needs it in order to get better. But I've been on the receiving end of some nasty shit about me, personally, that's all. It can suck, in that case. :/
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Date: 2009-07-31 04:06 am (UTC)I am excited and will read your meta as soon as you post it! \o/ I didn't even know JJ was obsessed with lighting. Maybe it IS a sign for slashers to have some hope. *crosses fingers*
*headdesk* I've heard so much about Home that it's kind of making me not want to read it. Everyone's talking it up, but I'm just like, "OMG I can only work on Apogee right now, okay?" XP
LOL, I spent four years (that I SHOULD have spent writing) reading fic instead. It's a bad thing to do. I figure, one epic fic a year for me, reading wise, is all I can do without really screwing up my writing schedule. Unfortunately, life is pain and I can't both read AND write. DDD:
And LOL, Apogee will keep on coming. I have lots of pieces written for future parts. It's all very exciting, really. \o/
No, that doesn't make you sound childish at all. I'll give you an example of something semi-similar that happened to me. In some writing class, I told this guy, "Wow. This is really good. I really don't know what to say" when I was commenting on his story. He replied, "Why, because you can't ever say anything nice?" It was a bitchslap to me and made me want to punch him, really. So, that's not exactly the same b/c we weren't talking about my work, but I still got a personal insult for a comment I was making (and it was a complimentary comment, too).
Sorry if I sounded like I meant that I was going to be mean to you. I'm not. I just meant that I've had too many people come back at me with unhelpful critiques b/c they were afraid to hurt my feelings. I figure, just discuss the work and we'll be fine. We all know how much time and energy an author takes on a story. So respect that and give the comments that need to be said.
That being said, if you want me to be nice and easy on you, I will. I've got no desire to scar you with scary feedback or anything. XP
Also, I wouldn't say anything nasty about an author due to their work, period. I don't get people who do that. DDD: It's senseless, truly.
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Date: 2009-07-25 04:48 am (UTC)-Mr. Weasley: puts himself and his family in danger to do experiments that are dangerous and also forbidden with objects that he knows next to nothing about; is unable to provide financially for his family and yet continues to have more children
-Mrs. Weasley: is only caring to children she deems "worthy" of care--notice how she ignores or talks badly about a lot of the Slytherin kids (if I remember correctly); was only created as a "good mother" figure for Harry and takes to him so soon it's creepy (I've always thought she had ulterior motives to "adopting" Harry Potter)
-Bill: marries Fleur seemingly without actually caring about her (she seems fond of him, however, and lucky him bagging a hottie *shakes head*); generally ignores his family pre-Fleur
-Charlie: has a dangerous low-paying job like his father; generally ignores his family
-Percy: abandons his family to suck up to the Ministry (despite his good reasons, the lack of loyalty is strikingly appalling)
-Fred & George: (being a twin myself, I hate putting them into one category, but unfortunately that's how they present themselves) viciously cruel to Slytherins in every book; they dropped out of school to run a joke shop with money they made from gambling; take great pleasure in causing other people pain
-Ron: nasty to everyone he doesn't outright like; jealous of Harry (who's an abused orphan) and often gets upset about this; would rather have indiscriminate sex than be with someone intelligent who loves him
-Ginny: (... there's too much, but I'll try) weak and cowardly; nobody trusts her with anything important; constantly makes bad decisions and has other people to cover for her; gets with several guys in a misguided attempt to make Harry jealous; gets away with bloody murder b/c her older brothers will protect her and she knows that and uses it
So I do have a lot of Weasley hate. As for Harry being gay, well, that's b/c he is gay in canon. I think a lot of readers were struck by just how gay Harry comes off as, and then for him to try and mack it with Cho was just revolting and humorously awkward all at the same time. I wrote an essay on homosexuality and HP for my Critical Writing class, and there really is just so much allegory that it's ridiculous. What always strikes me the most is that the school Dudley was going to, which Harry wanted to avoid, was Stonewall, which as you most likely know is considered the start of the current gay rights movement. So that's a whole bunch of interesting right from the beginning of the series, and the fact that JKR claims she didn't put any homosexual aspects into her series smacks me of dishonesty and bullshit, especially b/c after she said that she told everyone Dumbledore was gay.
LOL, I really think too much about this kind of thing, really I do. But you're welcome! I can keep this up for hours. *headdesk*
Okay, that's it now. *EPIC HEADDESK* LOL, this thread should be up somewhere, srsly.
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Date: 2009-07-29 03:58 am (UTC)It's the same for people who hated Harry after OotP, and have always hated Hermione. I DON'T GET IT. These are the Weasley-loving people. I'll just... never get them. (Sorry to repeat myself, but it's true. I'VE TRIED. Really, I have.)
There is so much that could've been done with this family, that it kind of makes me sick to think about all the possibilities that JKR ignored because they were wish-fulfillment characters. In the "Interview of Doom", there's a section where JKR talks about "Ginny's abilities", and how Percy would come back. I use to have this theory that Ginny was an occlumens/legilimens, and that Percy was the red-herring for the REAL traitor in the family (I speculated in an essay that Ginny still had a mind-link with Tom Riddle, but not as a horcrux). I just think... they could've been more sinister, and thus more interesting. A part of me wonders if she just started listening to her fanbase more, and that was part of the problem. (Again, it boggles my mind why so many like them... I DON'T GET IT. I DON'T GET IT. I DON'T - *mind explodes*)
...But I could wench all day about the Weasleys. They are just way too easy.
I think I wrote this in the other comment, but: Do you have your essay up anywhere? I never kept tabs on all the gay in HP, so it'd be nice to see what you came up with. Never noticed the Stonewall thing... which is weird, because I definitely know all about it, and did then. I guess after PoA I gave up on Harry being gay... which doesn't mean he stopped, lol. ;) (Plus, I was gunning for H/Hr, so that probably explained my obliviousness, too. But still - HBP was rather H/D to me, even though I didn't ship it. I remember feeling odd about that.)
JKR is just bullshit, period. For a woman that worked on a series for 15 years, she just couldn't get the job done without phoney romances and deus ex machinas. How disappointing. My theory on her was that the fans were more clever than she was, and she couldn't keep up. It's kind of sad.
(I think about these things too much because I have chronic insomnia. So it goes.)
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Date: 2009-07-29 07:07 am (UTC)I never got that Harry-hatred, or the Hermione-hatred. I just avoid these things so I don't have to stress over them. Harry was a real character at some points of the series, unlike most of the other characters who who shallow stereotypes. That doesn't mean I didn't like them, but thank God for fic! LOL, then you've done more than I have because I've never tried to understand them and I never will. :P
I like your Ginny mind-link with Tom theory--I was wondering the same thing myself for a while. JKR just sucks and you're right--her fans were way cleverer than she was, and it ended up screwing her over. I hated the idea of the Deathly Hallows for that very reason--a set of powerful God-like magical items that will kill Voldemort. HOW FUCKING CONVENIENT TO ONLY INTRODUCE THESE IN THE LAST BOOK WHEN NO ONE COULD HAVE GUESSED THEM BEFORE, JKR. *headdesk* Such a cop-out, truly. LOL, I introduced the way my epic battle is going to be won in the first fifty-sixty pages of the first book. It's just a matter of playing the ball and cups game, really--look over here while I do this other thing right in front of you, but if I get lucky you won't notice! XP
Oh, I said so before, but my HP essays aren't up online. I've got to find them first, then I'll post them. I do this one up online, which I should post on LJ but for now it's at Fiction Alley, called Of the Same Coin (http://www.fictionalley.org/authors/kowaiyoukai/OTSC01.html) and it deals with how alike Gryffindor/Slytherin and Harry/Draco are. But it's very generic b/c it was for a class that my professor didn't know anything about HP. So I had to make a lot of obvious statements to get my point across. Still, not my best writing, but it might be worth a quick read when you're bored.
Chronic insomnia FTW!! \o/ *headdesk*
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Date: 2009-07-30 05:49 am (UTC)I think she was wishing to be a red-head... and that's about it. XD
I hated the idea of the Deathly Hallows for that very reason--a set of powerful God-like magical items that will kill Voldemort. HOW FUCKING CONVENIENT TO ONLY INTRODUCE THESE IN THE LAST BOOK WHEN NO ONE COULD HAVE GUESSED THEM BEFORE, JKR. *headdesk* Such a cop-out, truly.
I keep reminding people that they are deus ex machinas, and nobody seems to agree with me. VAGUE hints in previous novels do NOT make proper introductions for magical objects! We never really had comparisons for Harry's cloak to let us know it was different or special - it wouldn't have killed her to mention that at some point. Actually, that's the really aggravating part for me, that it would've been so freakin' easy to give these things mention, so that the reader would've had a chance to guess, at least. I believe JKR has said that she doesn't like to "trick" readers - but the Deathly Hallows were a "trick", in my opinion. There was just no fair way to guess those before the series' end. I'm more of your opinion with the "ball and cups game". My stories have all the answers in plain sight. In a way, I'd like to think it's to reward the readers who pay attention; but I also think it's an interesting challenge to the author to still provide a good ending, knowing that the reader might know everything before it happens.
Totally have your essay bookmarked. ♥
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Date: 2009-07-30 08:06 pm (UTC)Oh no, you're absolutely right. The Deathly Hallows were deus ex machinas in every way. JKR should've given us some clue over the books about what was going on, but I think her fanbase got too smart (like you said earlier) and she couldn't keep up with them. So, what's a writer to do? Why, use a pathetic excuse to get out of the entire situation, of course! *headdesk* That's why I'm so adamant about including hints about everything all the way through. If readers figure it out, great. If they don't, that's okay too. Writing isn't about being the smartest person who knows all the secrets in the story. It's about telling a good story and hoping people get something out of it.
YAY! It's kind of cheesy, I know, but I think it's all right. I got an A on it, so that's something. :P
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Date: 2009-08-01 02:53 am (UTC)I just got done reading it, but I didn't want to respond on FA. Because basically: I agree. LOL. I'm sure you could've gone more in-depth, but at the same time, your essay still brings up interesting points. Rowling really has a hard-on for the "good vs. evil" thing, which I personally found disappointing. I think all the houses are a little sinister, really; but I'm more of the Sirius Black persuasion, where he says that life is more gray than black or white. I guess I see that about human beings, as well (and wizards!).
Black's comment in OotP seems kind of odd in retrospect, because JKR didn't seem to acknowledge this by uniting Gryffindor and Slyhterin in DH, whom I agree are "two halves of the same whole" (Ha, my brain went to K/S for a moment, and went "GENE!"). While I don't think Slytherin are entirely "evil", she did seem to hammer that idea home throughout the books. To me, Gryffindors were always kind of awful - which a reviewer of yours pointed out, and I went "DUH." But then again, everyone seems to love the Weasleys (except us), and so they seem to gloss over their bad behavior and make them exceptions. (When "the good guys" lock "the bad guys" into vanishing cabinets, it's a-okay, but if it were the reverse OMG HOW DARE THEY OMG EVIL.)
All the houses are certainly complementary, as you pointed out. Perhaps the "good vs. evil" thing was simplified because HP is considered children's lit; when really everyone has the qualities of the other houses - which Rowling seemed to point to when Harry almost wound up in Slytherin, or when Cedric was brave in defending Harry, or that Hermione was smart enough to compete with the Ravenclaws, or when Ron was more jealous than Draco, at some points. Perhaps I'm not giving her enough credit in DH, but all of that seemed undermined when Slytherin didn't join up with everyone else in the final battle. A part of me almost seems sure that if JKR commented on Harry almost landing in Slytherin, she'd probably say it was a "Good vs. Evil" moment, instead of your view. How disappointing.
Anyway - just wanted to say I found it interesting. Has your opinion changed much since HBP and DH?
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Date: 2009-08-01 04:00 am (UTC)In fact, when Slytherin was left out in DH, it had me really wondering what JKR's plans were. Is she just aiming for hoping that people will conclude that every 11-year-old child sorted into Slytherin will immediately turn into a mass-murdering lunatic? Or does she have some sort of plan involving subtly convincing people to turn against everyone who doesn't have the same viewpoints she does? Either way, it's a sad thing and quite confusing for anyone who can... well, think.
And oh, did you enjoy that one reviewer's comment? I swear, reading that kind of shit is the reason I've stopped using sites besides LJ. It's like, um, hello? Did you even READ the essay? B/c you're agreeing with me. *headdesk* And let's not get into the grammatical horrors of it all. D:
As we've previously discussed, JKR is an incompetent troll who doesn't know what to do with good characters when she's got them. It's just a sad thing that she thinks hiding under the realm of children's lit will make it okay.